While I was working yet another tiring shift at work this morning, lunchtime arrived. We always get a pretty good after church crowd, and I saw this pastor walk in. I had attended his church for a few weeks after I met him at the coffee shop. It was an odd meeting actually. He was upset because it was an extremely busy day and it was taking too long to get his order. It really was, he was totally legit in being angry. I recognized him because Zach had brought this newspaper home with an ad about this church. The ad was extremely dramatic, but interesting so we looked up the website and saw some videos. I ended up asking the guy if he was the pastor of that church, and he got totally embarrassed about being upset. I was not judging or implying anything when I asked him, but it was kinda funny. Anyhow, we got to talking about church and all that. He seemed to have some awesome ideas for how the church is actually supposed to be. So, Zach and I went a few times. It was ok. It was small and churchy. I can handle that just fine. There was one Sunday in particular though that the pastor made the congregation feel guilty for not singing. No offense, but I don't always like to sing in church, never have really. Besides that one awkward Sunday, no one really made an effort to get to know us. I had a few guys talk to me when I went alone the first time, but when I brought Zach no one talked to us. It was just annoying and typical. I felt like I was in high school, but at least I knew the pastor right? Nope...he didn't even recognize me. Not the first time that has happened. However; today when he came into the shop he recognized me right away as the girl he had talked to before. He still had no recollection of me ever attending his church. I even talked to him once at the church.
I was kind of hoping he wouldn't remember me, because I did not want to get into why I wasn't coming to church anymore. But, it kind of hurt more and reiterated why I don't go to church when he didn't remember me ever coming at all. This has happened to me more than once where I leave a church and not a soul ever checks in with me. They may hear through the grapevine, but they never really check in on me. That hurts more when it was a church I was extremely involved with. Anyhow, that is all one big reason I do not go to church anymore. That sense of family is not there. I get that more with the people I work with, the family I do have, and the friends I have made.
